Administration Trumpets 235,000 New Jobs

  • Bureau of Labor Statistics revising approach to be more like “how the Chinese do it”.
  • New commissioner says that next month “I think we could sell a number like 350,000”

The Trump administration announced job growth of 235,000 jobs in December, Trump’s first full month in office.

Saying that they wanted to start providing “real facts” instead of the “fake numbers” of the Obama and Bush years, they also announced management, staff, and policy changes at the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS).  Acting BLS Commissioner, Bill Wiatrowski, has been replaced by Michael Sexton, formerly a principal at Trump University.

About 80% of the current statistical staff as well as the dedicated technology staff has been fired.  They had been responsible for maintaining the data feeds and statistical analysis that have been continuously refined since the Bureau’s first employment report in 1915.

Sexton said “Getting all these numbers in from all over the place is a huge mess.  Over the last day or two I’ve developed a much simpler way.  It’s much closer to how the Chinese do it.  And you gotta love their growth numbers.”

He went on “If the current approach was working, how come Obama’s numbers looked so good even though everybody knew the economy stunk.  This was just a cozy gig for so-called statistical and economics experts, kind of like those phony climate change scientists”.

“Next month we’ll revise this up to 275,000.  Then I think we could sell a number like 350,000.”

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